Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Death and Burial

The King of Saudi Arabia was buried today. They wrapped him a robe, carried him on a board and buried him in an unmarked location in the desert. That's the way to treat the dead. This is how they treat a king even.

American funeral traditions are silly. We spend thousands of dollars to bury our dead. First we replace body fluids with chemicals so we can morbidly look at the body for a few days. Then we put the cadaver in a fancy box that costs thousands of dollars and will only be seen for a week at most. We buy a spot in a cemetery beside hundreds or thousands of other dead people. We place a stone, sometimes a very fancy one, to mark the location. What an incredible waste of money, time and resources. When I die, harvest me for whatever organs someone else might find useful, toss me in a fire naked and do whatever you please with the ashes, as long it's not a landfill or something weird. (You can skip the fire if there is a desert or other unpopulated area available.) Don't pump my body full of chemicals, don't waste money on a box that's never going to be seen again, and don't bother with wasting valuable real estate to bury my body. I would say don't bother with a funeral and parade either, but that's more for the living so I guess that's OK. Assuming anyone actually cares about my passing and needs closure or something.

By the way, everyone should donate their organs. It's an atrocity that anyone should die because they had to wait too long for an organ when thousands of perfectly good organs get buried in fancy caskets every day. Besides, it's the best gift you could ever give.


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